Tuning in to my Spouse
Have you ever had a lovely evening out with your spouse… only to see it disappear when someone tuned out? That almost happened to me the other night. My husband and I were having a great dinner and I was feeling relaxed and expansive. Then, he started fading. You know the look where someone’s body is there, but you can tell the mind is leaving the premises. With no forwarding address.
When I asked him where we went, he said his back was beginning to ache so he’d started to tune out. Then, he suggested we leave. I watched my expansiveness shrivel; we got the check, and I started feeling downright chilly.
The evening could have ended there. Instead, we stopped by the bookstore, where I decided to look for books in my own aisle, thank you very much. As I grumpily picked through the books, I realized that instead of being present, I kept blaming him for fading and ending our date. Rather than stay stuck in the past, I chose to re-focus on the moment — on the interesting titles, the colors of the book spines, and the little blonde boy squatting on the floor peering at pictures. I took responsibility for where I was, right then. As I did that, the blame and disappointment melted. When my husband rounded a bend of bookshelves, I was able to hug him with nothing of the past hanging on. We were simply us again, and enjoying the moment together.
Discover Your Own Pearls: Have you ever had a mid-date “moment” with your spouse that was less than ideal? Next time that happens, how can you use “being in the moment” to shift the energy another direction?
